So after scouring every store in the area, I purchased a suit of sorts. I bought a pair of black pants from H&M and a A.Byer black jacket from Macy's junior department. What a pain in the ass- I remember when I graduated high school (in 1996- ugh) and there was an abundance of inexpensive suits in stores like Sterns, Lord & Taylor and the Herald Square Macy's. Now it's this rare item, like the Honus Wagner baseball card** of the apparel world.
While cursing my short stature, I stumbled across the best photo EVER. It turns out that Simon Cowell wears gigantic high heel boots:
Is this guy kidding? He needs to switch to something less obvious, like lifts!
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that this was Fleet Week. Did anyone go to any of the events?
Finally, if anyone still cares, the egg came first.
**Fewer than 10 are known to exist